090 Entrepreneurial Anxiety, Apathy and Depression (Virtual Meetup), with Melanie Ginsburg and Samantha Alvarez

Entrepreneurial Anxiety, Apathy and Depression (Virtual Meetup), with Melanie Ginsburg and Samantha Alvarez

"...I will say of depression, not true depression, anxiety, just very unpleasant while I was running my business and had to learn very fast how to swim. So now I'm hoping to teach these lessons. I'm hoping to catch them before the shipwreck, so to speak. But during is also, you know, if I can pull myself out, you can pull yourself out. So wherever you're at right now, know that it will be okay. And you can do it..."

Episode Highlights

Why More now

• Due to corona worries, lockdown constrictions and economic recession for some businesses. 
  • Everyone is grieving the major changes that are occurring
  • Stages of Grief: DABDA - Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Acceptance (not necessarily in that order)
• See Sam’s article for more details and help on quarantine related mental health issues. In the Resources section at the bottom. From that article:
  • 30% of people in Quarantine become clinically depressed
  • 30% become clinically diagnosable with PTSD (with some overlap of people getting both, of course), 
  • and that these symptoms last at least one month after quarantine.

What is Ideal mental health

• Ideal mental health
  • Resilient - bounce back from setbacks, 
  • Flexible - fast to pivot
  • Calm, focused
  • Joyful
  • Connected to spirit, intuitive
  • Social. EQ. SQ. (Emotional Intelligence, Spiritual Intelligence)
  • A healthy relationship with self
• For ideal mental health, the positive attitude should be at a good level, so that the individual feels happy with themselves. 
  • Self-actualization. Self-actualization is being in a state of contentment, feeling that you have become the best you can be. 
  • Autonomy. This is having independence and self-reliance.
• Connection with nature...outward and inward focus balanced

Barriers

The Creeping Problem

• Mental illness creeps up on people
• Distractions hide it
  • Dissociated 
  • In the Matrix = “normal” (desirable) to be busy
• Not socially acceptable to discuss or admit to it
• Compare to breaking a leg and getting it fixed vs covering up
  • Pills as temp crutch
  • Hitting leg with hammer daily but not want to be aware of it
• Notice if isolated -- check-in with self...then make outward connection email call visit zoom (vs. distraction) 

Resistance to Asking for Help

Resistance to recognizing you have a problem and getting help:

• Mental illness shame - avoid talking about it, afraid what others will think of me
• An entrepreneur has to be strong for others 
• (co)-Head of family ditto
• It’s a feeling, and it is not rational
  • Hard to explain with logic and words
• Entrepreneurs have bigger financial responsibilities and risk levels
• Entrepreneurs are outcasts from traditional society already - lack of others to understand us
• Chronic Workaholism and culture of long hours
  • Hard to break this habit
• No refuge (home anxiety == work anxiety)
• Location-independent ones doubly so
  • Distance from deep support systems
  • Lack of groundedness with current community
  • Breadth over depth of support

Anxiety

• Corona lockdown and economic recession accentuates existing anxiety(s)
• Anxiety spectrum: Low-grade constant worry → Full on Fear Panic Attacks
• Obsessive, uncontrollable thoughts 
  • Obsessive behavior. Constant rechecking. Controlling others and things. Perfectionism. 
  • Negative interpretations of what others say.
  • Rampant (negative) imagination
• Trouble concentrating or thinking about anything other than the present worry
• Having trouble sleeping
• Imposter Syndrome
• Brain and body chemistry from past trauma. PTSD.
• Physical health issues associated with anxiety
  • Heart racing, trouble breathing, Sweating, Trembling, Dry mouth
  • Nausea/loss of appetite/insatiable appetite
  • Tummy pain, poor digestion, diarrhea.
  • Headaches, back pain
  • Diabetes
  • Thyroid problems
  • Depressed immune system
• Some specify anxiety disorders:
  • Agoraphobia is a type of anxiety disorder in which you fear and often avoid places or situations that might cause you to panic and make you feel trapped, helpless or embarrassed.
  • Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) includes persistent and excessive anxiety and worry about activities or events — even ordinary, routine issues. The worry is out of proportion to the actual circumstance, is difficult to control and affects how you feel physically. It often occurs along with other anxiety disorders or depression.
  • Panic Disorder involves repeated episodes of sudden feelings of intense anxiety and fear or terror that reach a peak within minutes (panic attacks). You may have feelings of impending doom, shortness of breath, chest pain, or a rapid, fluttering or pounding heart (heart palpitations). These panic attacks may lead to worrying about them happening again or avoiding situations in which they've occurred.
  • Social Anxiety Disorder (social phobia) involves high levels of anxiety, fear and avoidance of social situations due to feelings of embarrassment, self-consciousness and concern about being judged or viewed negatively by others.
  • Specific Phobias are characterized by major anxiety when you're exposed to a specific object or situation and a desire to avoid it. Phobias provoke panic attacks in some people.
  • Substance-induced Anxiety Disorder is characterized by symptoms of intense anxiety or panic that are a direct result of misusing drugs, taking medications, being exposed to a toxic substance or withdrawal from drugs.
  • From https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961

Apathy

• Lack of joy, excitement, interest in your work, relationships or life.
• Burnout. Bored.
• The main symptom of apathy is a lack of motivation to do, complete, or accomplish anything. You may also experience low energy levels.
• Lack of action
• Tasks and things pile up. Email inbox, VMs, Procrastination. Lack of fulfillment in biz and life. 
• Increasing distractions and addictions
  • These soak up your attention for the moment, which can sometimes be healthy in short bursts, to get distance from the problem. but unhealthy in the medium-to-long term as you don't resolve or even engage with your problem(s)
• Lack of exercise or activity or socialization (mental thought “why bother?”)
• Physical health issues associated with apathy
  • Headaches, back pain, tummy pain, poor digestion, diarrhea, constipation. 
  • Anemia, eating disorders, addiction hangovers 
  • Depressed immune system
• A way of becoming numb to protect - yet covers true self

Depression

• Can be very similar to apathy - lack of interest, everything feels meaningless but with an overlay of negative mental thoughts that make you feel even worse.
• Cruel internal dialogue (“You are worthless, nobody loves you, you are broken, you are beyond fixing”)
• A belief that things can not and will not get better 
• Difference between feeling sad and feeling depressed! 
  • Sadness is a specific reaction to something. It fades with time and action.
  • Depression is an entire long term mood. It is much harder to shake off. 
  • The biggest difference between emotions and emotional disorders is the ongoing mind chatter. It honestly feels like an alien/demon has taken over your mind → helpful to personify that demon to recognize that it is NOT YOU and those voices are NOT TRUE
  • These may be voices from your childhood from parents, teachers, bullys or more recent from friends, coworkers, bosses, customers or spouses. 
  •  
  • Or you may have an actual negative spirit entity(s) attached to you that is giving you the negative thoughts and energy. An energy healer or shaman can remove these. 
  •  
• Risk of self-harm or suicide 
• Physical health issues associated with depression
  • All the same ones as apathy:
    • Headaches, back pain, tummy pain, poor digestion, diarrhea, constipation. 
    • Anemia, eating disorders, addiction hangovers 
    • Depressed immune system
  • Chronic pain, fibromyalgia, and chronic fatigue
  • Irritable bowel syndrome, multiple chemical sensitivity
  • PTSD, panic attacks
  • Poor diet and exercise makes digestion issues, body aches and pains worse
  • Heart disease, strokes

Suicide

• • Time to talk about the elephant in the room
  • Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the US
    • Is 2nd leading cause in 30-year-olds
  • On average, there are 129 suicides per day.
    • Approx 40k per year
    • 1.4M suicide attempts per year (2018)
    • An estimated 9.3 million adults (3.9% of the adult U.S. population) reported having suicidal thoughts in the past year. 
    • Suicide and self-injury cost the US $69B per year (2015)
    • The annual U.S. suicide rate increased by 24% between 1999 and 2014

• After suicide

  • It is not your fault 
  • Be supportive
  • Support survivors
  • (let’s take a breath!)

• Rat race rant

  • We are not looking at these incredible mental illness and suicide statistics as being indicative of deep unlying problems with our society’s programming and the rat race. 

Prevention tips

The Basics

• • Quality Sleep
  • Healthy Diet
  • Gut health
  • Reduce Drugs
  • Daily Exercise
  • Time in Nature
  • Sunshine
  • Digital detox
  • Regular Touch

Early Detection

• • • Intuition
    • Meditation
    • Journaling
    • Mirroring from others (family, friends, masterminds)

Gratitude practice

Laughter

Play time

Joy audit

Limit social media/news exposure 

Nurture your support network (aka friends)

Cures

• If bad get professional help (see below) 
• Reset on your Basics
• Clear vision and Why for your biz → work meaning
  • It needs to be more than money or being busy
• Work/life balance
  • You are not your business. Identity. 
• Energy shifts
  • EFT tapping. EMDR
• Self-acceptance and forgiveness
  • If you were talking to a child would you be so hard on them as you are with yourself?
• Self-compassion 
• Drugs and therapy
• Routines
• Ask for help - Support - friends, family, crisis-lines, co-counseling, coach
• Reframing

Loving Reminders

• I know we’re all overachievers. But this is a crazy time. Now is not necessarily the time for you to reach your full potential. It is a time to focus on preventing you from hitting rock bottom. Ease some of that pressure. You don’t need to be operating at full capacity right now.
• YOU ARE NOT YOUR BUSINESS: your work is not a reflection of your worth. If sales went down this month, you are still valuable. If you lost money this month, you are still lovable. If you didn’t sign any new clients this month, you are still a rockstar. Do not tie your worth to your business's success. 
• In regular times, social media is a highlight reel for activities. Now, it is a highlight reel for emotions. Every single person is experiencing anxiety and grief and fear about this situation. Do not let social media fool you into thinking you are ‘broken’ or ‘weak’ for feeling scared. Remember that social media is meticulously curated and do not compare yourself to what you see there

Resources

• Meetup slides (Thanks AshleyPemberton for making them look fab!)
• Video replay of meetup  
• How people are affected by Quarantine and Isolation, and How to Help Them - preso notes and article by Samantha 
• Call Suicide prevention lifeline
  • it is free
  • Confidential
  • And available 24/7
  • 1800 273 8255

• Suicide Prevention Lifeline
• Map to help with international suicide prevention resources
• PTSD and TRE
• Pigs in the Parlor: A handbook for deliverance from demons and spiritual oppression. by Frank Hammond 
• Trauma healing  
• Psychology Today
• MHA National, Finding a therapy
• CDC Leading causes of death stats
• https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/
• CDC Violence prevention

Related Michaela podcasts 

• • CF Suicide, Depression, and Recovery with Jorge Reyes
  • Oh my GAD (General Anxiety Disorder) with Jeffrey Kunkel
  • Turning Mind-Blowing Daily Pain Into Super Business Power with Jeremy Ginsburg
  • From the Pit of Addictions to the Peaks of Business Intuition with Russ Perry
  • Handling Change in the Face of Fear with Kyle Gray
  • Waking Up Your Body to Infinite Intuitive Business Wisdom with Natalie Baack
  • 12 Ways to Increase Your Business Intuition And Be Healthier
  • How to Overcome Entrepreneurial Impostor Syndrome Case Study
  • Quitting Drinking to Hear Your Intuition (How Anna moved from burnout to abundance)
  • From Trading My Soul for Money to Joy (and Insights from Mt Kilimanjaro) with Alon Shabo
  • From Business Burnout and Apathy to Focus and Joy

Tools

• Brain.fm focus and sleep music
• Pzizz focus, nap and sleep app with customizable voice overs and music
• Headspace meditation app
• RescueTime time tracker and distracting app controller for PC, Mac, Linux, iPhone and Android. 

Disclaimer and when to get professional help

• This meetup is not a substitute for therapy or medical advice
  • If you need professional help, please get it

See your doctor or a mental health provider if:

• You feel like you're worrying too much and it's interfering with your work, relationships or other parts of your life
• Your fear, worry or anxiety is upsetting to you and difficult to control
• You feel depressed, have trouble with alcohol or drug use, or have other mental health concerns along with anxiety
• You think your anxiety could be linked to a physical health problem
• You have suicidal thoughts or behaviors — if this is the case, seek emergency treatment immediately

Your worries may not go away on their own, and they may get worse over time if you don't seek help. See your doctor or a mental health provider before your anxiety gets worse. It's easier to treat if you get help early.

From https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/anxiety/symptoms-causes/syc-20350961

Questions to share with friends

• Share one thing that inspired you to come to this meetup?
  • What are you hoping to learn/get out of this meetup?
• How has corona, lockdown or economy changes affected your anxiety?
• How has it affected your apathy and motivation?
• How has it affected your depression?
• What good habits have you started that help?
• What’s the most exciting thing you are working on in your business right now?
• Each person will get 2min. To share their name, business, biggest goal they have for this time and their greatest need or challenge they are facing and what support they need.

Interview transcript

Michaela Light 0:01
All right. Welcome back to the intuitive leadership mastery podcast. I'm here with Melanie Gibbs Ginsberg. Hi, Melanie. Hi. And we might be joined by Samantha Alvarez. She is a nurse practitioner working in a hospital in New York and she got some pages so she might have difficulty joining but we will cover for her part. And today we're going to be talking about entrepreneurial anxiety, apathy and depression, which given the corona lockdown the economic depression, and various other excitements and isolations is a big thing right now. So welcome, Melanie. For those who don't know, Melanie, tell us about yourself in a brief whatever. Wow, I'm awesome. You are awesome.

Melanie 0:52
I, let's see, the reason that you should be trusting me to talk about this is that I experienced quite a heavy dose

I will say of depression, not true depression, anxiety, just very unpleasant while I was running my business and had to learn very fast how to swim. So now I'm hoping to teach these lessons. I'm hoping to catch them before the shipwreck, so to speak. But during is also, you know, if I can pull myself out, you can pull yourself out. So wherever you're at right now, know that it will be okay. And you can do it.

Michaela Light 1:27
That's great. And as well as being an author or an intuition coach on business intuition. I also have had episodes of depression and anxiety and OCD and various other things. So we'll talk more about each other's excitements later. And I know Samantha has had episodes of anxiety and she gave a meet up on this and we both all three of us have given various some different meetups in the dynamite circle which is an entrepreneur group around this top these different topics, anxiety, apathy and depression in entrepreneurship. So, very cool. Feel free to put questions in the chat. And let's share the OLED screen because we have some cute slides. But if you're listening on audio Do not worry. We will be saying everything that you need to hear. And Michaela is wondering what happened to the show the screen button. Here it is.

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